Any hardworking, caring parent who has fought the urge to knock teeth down a rebellious teenage throat through which ungratefulness is spewing understands why Tommy Jordan shot his daughter’s laptop computer.
That’s right. Shot it. Nine times. With his .45. Not that the gun or the bullets are the subject here. They are just the exclamation point on the end of the sentence.
And what Jordan seems to be saying is this: I love my daughter enough not to rob her of a capacity for shame! I love her enough that I will blow holes in her inflated sense of entitlement, literally and figuratively, so that she will be an adult who contributes well to a society that can actually tolerate her!
In case you aren’t one of the millions who have viewed the viral online video of the laptop’s demise, Tommy Jordan is a North Carolina man who this month spent several hours and considerable money upgrading his 15-year-old daughter’s computer.
During the process, Jordan – the owner of an IT company – ran across a Facebook post by his girl, who had been punished previously over inappropriate posts. The first time, she lost electronic privileges for three months, and Jordan told her a subsequent infraction would result in worse repercussions.
So it’s not as if she hadn’t been warned. Warnings are welcome in good-parenting manuals.
This time, Jordan found an obscenity-laced diatribe addressed to him and his wife complaining about chores.
“I’m not your (expletive) slave. It’s not my responsibility to clean up your (expletive). We have a cleaning lady for a reason,” her Facebook post said. “If you want coffee, get off your (expletive) and get it yourself. If you want a garden, shovel the fertilizer yourself, don’t sit back on your (expletive) and watch me do it.”
And my favorite: “I’m going to hate to see the day you get too old to wipe your own (expletive) and you call me up. I won’t be there.”
Because Daddy no doubt never wiped her butt, or her nose, or kissed her boo-boos, or bought her food, clothing, shelter and, oh, a laptop that she used to publicly denigrate him.
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